‘Toy Story 5’ Review: If It’s A (New) Toy Story, Baby, Just Say NO!

Things haven’t been the same since Toy Story 3, which I happened to have watched last week for the first time. Strange as it may sound but these are not the films I grew up with, so when I claim that the Toy Story trilogy is up there with one of the best trilogies of all time, I say that without any nostalgia clouding my vision. I do have a bias towards one toy in particular, my number one boy Hamm (John Ratzenberger), who for some reason has been sledgehammered, sidelined and like the majority of toys that I came to love in the first three films is kept in a garage (a toy’s hoosegow) for majority of the film; and the new toys with the exception of Smarty Pants (fantastic VA by Conan O’Brien) don’t have the zing!

The synopsis of the film reads as follows: “Woody (Tom Hanks), Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen), Jessie (Joan Cusack) and the rest of the gang’s jobs are challenged when they come face-to-face with Lilypad, a brand-new tablet device that arrives with her own disruptive ideas about what is best for their kid, Bonnie. Will playtime ever be the same?”

I personally cope by believing that these toys have somehow bilocated, in the way they are the same but worse, perhaps victimised by IP exhaustion. A toy’s worth in Toy Story is measured by the owner’s love for the toy, and Bonnie (Scarlett Spears) clearly has none for Hamm (apologies for hammering Hamm everywhere, but he’s the coolest ever to do it) and the old squad. What’s new is that Bonnie is now subjected to FOMO, natural for a kid and even for adults in the process of becoming one; the cure for her FOMO is a tech-toy Lilypad that’ll help her integrate with the kids of her own age; and you don’t have to think twice before speculating and be right on the money about what the narrative of the film will shape up to be.

We know these toys, these self-aware commodities that exist solely for pleasing their owners, that have been through their share of existentialism, and in such thoughtful and emotionally hitting ways in the first three films that it’s almost impossible for new films to add anything more to what has already been done. The grim accomplishment of Toy Story 5 is that it makes them toys boring.

The effective simplicity of the first three films is what makes them profound. The new Toy Story trades simplicity for relatively intricate plots that quickly sizzle and ends up in a burnout. The art direction of the film is, however, impressive, and the toys look neat with the advancement of animation, yet the sheen of it all isn’t even close to capturing and critiquing the consumer society in ways that the first three films did.

Now back to Hamm, he’s a pal who boosts your morale; and the coolness of a Toy Story film is directly proportional to Hamm’s screentime; and ironically another pig has more screentime than my boy Hamm: Jimmy Dean doesn’t have the aura Hamm has. Randy Newman’s score is consistent across these films; however, this film is sonically marred by the new Taylor Swift song at the end; make of that what you will. This is the Dead Reckoning of Toy Story films.

Toy Story 5 is directed by Andrew Stanton and stars Joan Cusack as Jessie, Tom Hanks as Woody, Tim Allen as Buzz Lightyear, Conan O’Brien as Smarty Pants, Greta Lee as Lilypad, Shelby Rabara as Snappy, Craig Robinson as Atlas, and Scarlett Spears as Bonnie. Keanu Reeves, Ernie Hudson, and Tony Hale also star in the film.

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